Featured

AdRiFt.

Generally, the way things function here is in the following order. First, I go over my past experiences, and second, I try to advise on how you can avoid the blunders I made. Today, there is a change in this order. You see, I find myself in a dilemma, constantly doubting myself, directionless and without a purpose. In simpler terms, I am ADRIFT.
Now, there are not a lot of times this happens with me. It is only the second time this is happening. I am the kind of person that has micromanages everything. From the outfit, I want to wear to my career and where I want to settle down. So, when I find myself questioning every decision I have ever made with a single recurring question, “What is the point?” it has left me sleepless for nights.
So what is the point? Why am I working so hard? Will achieving my goals ever make me happy? What is happiness? With each question, I find myself spiralling even more. The more I think, the more tangled my thoughts become.
To be sincere, to sum my thoughts up in this concluding paragraph is like containing a hurricane in a water bottle. So I leave with thought alone, why did you start in the first place? As I find answers to my questions, I encourage you to find yours. Maybe sometimes, being back to square one isn’t a bad thing.

Featured

PoV

Point Of View

What do you see in this picture? You must see nothing but a vine creeping its way up an aged tree which is dried and frail. To take a broader look at the image, you may see an anemic tree giving its health and power to a new life form so it could grow and flourish. But, what if I told you that the worn-out lifeless tree was not the same before. It was well-off and wholesome. The creeper did not exist. The plant crept its way up the healthy tree and sucked the life out of it. Now the tree stands there still, lifeless, sans leaves, sans branches. Now, it does not provide shade or host small animals that once lived on it.

Both of these possibilities are true, undeniable. It is just how you look at the image, how you see the creeper and the tree. Whether you want to make the creeper the antagonist or the protagonist. It is your POV.

How you look at things is extremely important for the state of your mind. Going back to the case, some may look at it as a life-consuming plant, some as a plant growing to sustain itself. But for some, it is simply a creeper. It is how you glance at it. We often make prejudicial statements and stick to them for our entire lives, but your POV can change, your opinions can change. Some people feel guilty about change. Changing your POV is a sign of growth. It shows that you understood both sides of the situation and then came to a logical conclusion instead of following the opinions of the herd. 

How you see the world makes you what you are. Determining your POV is your verdict but what’s more significant is that you think before you conclude.

So what’s your POV?

Featured

PaUsE.

I have totally skipped the fact that last year actually happened. Mostly because,we were locked in our houses for the half of it. Seems like it went by in the blink of an eye. I’m sure I’m not the only one that felt this. But now that I look back everything seems changed. I don’t remember when I grew up. When we all grew up. And how almost each thing we do or have done has a memory of our childhood connected to it. May it be as regular as seeing a muddy puddle , smelling the scent of petrichor in the air and instantly remembering your childhood when you danced in the rain or be it the place you waited on for your school bus to arrive.

It’s the simple things that make you realise how far you’ve come. And when you look forward all you see are studies, jobs, better lifestyle as you should but when you chase these things, somewhere you lose a part of yourself that once stopped to smell the flowers in their garden and was fascinated by the shimmering stars in the sky. Who stopped and appreciated.

When is the last time you actually took time out for yourself to do the things that once made you happy? Play games that put a smile on your face?

Pause. Take a moment. Look back. Don’t let that part of you go that didn’t need big reasons to smile, even a piece of chocolate was enough. Did you look back? What do you see?

Featured

SpEaK.


Our generation is good at a variety of things like social media, technology but the one thing we commonly resist to do is confrontation. We may not be scared to voice our opinions against big issues in our society but we will never tell our friend that their picture isn’t “post-worthy”. This is one of the numerous instances that will come to your mind when you think about it.

But why do we avoid this?Why are we so intimidated by the consequences? Im not suggesting to say everything that comes to your mind. One should always think before he speaks butallowing that to eat you from inside isn’t something healthy.

When you keep things within you, you start over-thinking and over-analysing various probable outcomes the situation might lead to. “What happens if this” “What happens if that” This may lead to stress, anxiety and various other issues. Isn’t saying stuff out loud better then? There is always a way to deal with the outcomes and it may not go your way each and every time but is it worth taking the risk? Well, that’s something you need to speculate about.

And if things don’t go your way its okay to feel disheartened for a while but remember that it isn’t the end. Talk to your friends, your loved ones, do the things that make you happy and get on with life. Maybe there’s something better out there for you. At least now you have clarity and you don’t have the burden of doubt on your back.


PaUsE.

I have totally skipped the fact that last year actually happened. Mostly because,we were locked in our houses for the half of it. Seems like it went by in the blink of an eye. I’m sure I’m not the only one that felt this. But now that I look back everything seems changed. I don’t remember when I grew up. When we all grew up. And how almost each thing we do or have done has a memory of our childhood connected to it. May it be as regular as seeing a muddy puddle , smelling the scent of petrichor in the air and instantly remembering your childhood when you danced in the rain or be it the place you waited on for your school bus to arrive.

It’s the simple things that make you realise how far you’ve come. And when you look forward all you see are studies, jobs, better lifestyle as you should but when you chase these things, somewhere you lose a part of yourself that once stopped to smell the flowers in their garden and was fascinated by the shimmering stars in the sky. Who stopped and appreciated.

When is the last time you actually took time out for yourself to do the things that once made you happy? Play games that put a smile on your face?

Pause. Take a moment. Look back. Don’t let that part of you go that didn’t need big reasons to smile, even a piece of chocolate was enough. Did you look back? What do you see?

ExPeCtAtIoNs

A RUBYABLE SHORT.

Today marks one year of Rubyable. I’m nothing but grateful and I hope that yall love and support this blog in the days to come too.

That being said, let me introduce today’s topic, expectations.

I describe myself to be an over-enthusiastic person. I’m always thrilled to travel, go shopping, try new things, I know I’m not the only one.

Whenever I get excited, I start expecting outcomes from the situations but often, these expectations lead to disappointment. Does this happen to you too?

I was tired of this happening constantly and that’s why I started interospecting about what was mistaken.

After a lot of reasoning, I finally concluded that your expectations will not always turn into reality and what youre expecting isn’t going to change the reality, so why waste your energy on expecting?

Don’t get me wrong, expectations aren’t always wrong for you. Instead of making others the instrument of your happiness, why don’t you take charge? Why can’t you fulfil all your expectations? What qualities does the person in front of you have that you don’t?

So instead of putting time into others why not invest your time in yourself? We are often swayed by the stories of Cinderella, how the key to her happiness lies in some glass slipper. Or like in Alladdin,some Genie will appear and solve all your problems magically within the blink of an eye. Our brain is conditioned to believe that our happiness counts on something and someone and that we have no management over it. It’s about time we realized that we are accountable for our own happiness. Our life is not a fairytale. What are you waiting for? Start working, and make yourself proud.

A N G S T

MY ENCOUNTERS WITH ANXIETY.

TW: Anxiety,Panic attacks.

Picture credits:https://etsy.me/3eJxwqO

Anxiety is a matter which all of us deal with. Some of us on minute everyday things and some of us relatively existential. It’s okay to feel anxious periodically in fact, anxiety sometimes pushes us to do the stuff we’ve been putting off. But, when things slip out of hand it gets brutal.

Today id like to address my encounters with anxiety. I got my first panic attack in school when I was in ninth grade. I remember it like it was yesterday. I was shivering, I couldn’t breathe, I could barely talk, everything went blank. I couldn’t comprehend what was wrong with me. No one could. With each moment that passed by my pulse increased till I could hear it up to my head.I could see my classmates rushing to get me some Glucon D, my teacher comforting me and for some reason that made me feel even more anxious. After an odd hour, I started to feel alright.

It got worse later, to a degree where it lead to a cluster of issues like depression and insomnia. I started staying up late. Some days I would stay up till 8 am in the morning and then go to sleep. This lead to a decrease in my appetite and I started losing weight. I knew this wasn’t good for me but I also knew that I had no control over it. Atleast that’s what I thought. I lost all my confidence that’s why I deleted all my social media accounts. I was isolated. My family noticed it and encouraged me to get medical attention After that, I started seeing counsellors and psychotherapists which helped me identify my triggers. There was a lot of pressure on what the people around me would think but, my family and my close friends encouraged me to get help and I’m eternally indebted to have them around.

I would like to say, don’t be scared of the issues you face or what the people around you think of it. Don’t be nervous to ask for medical/professional help when you think that you need it. You may feel worthless and helpless like I did but what I learnt through it was that one needs to be his own support system. That is the only way out.

In conclusion, if by reading this you can relate even to the smallest amounts or gather at least an ounce of courage to get through, it will make my day.

Thanks for reading this far and if youre going through issues as well, I hope you get through it.

R E C I P R O C A T E

Photo creds: https://pin.it/21YyhPN

Imagine you have a piggy bank. Now, imagine collecting penny after penny to fill that bank. Imagine that your efforts have finally come to fruition. The second you open the piggy bank, you realize that there is nothing inside. That’s precisely how it feels to put your 100% into something and achieving nothing in return.

We often push ourselves aside for making someone else happy. All our efforts, our time goes for them. And when you expect something in return, it’s usually a disappointment. So why do you always choose others over yourself? Why do you want to talk to a wall and expect it to talk back? Let’s introspect. How many people are willing to put in efforts, if you stop putting in efforts for them? Will they reciprocate?

Instead, utilize that energy on yourself. Do the things that make you happy. Life is a two-way street. If you’re the only one putting in the efforts, it’s going to be exhausting. It’s not selfish to expect something in return, you probably deserve it. You deserve to be happy, to be cherished and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

THE CURSED LAKE

Guest post #1

Being the lone passenger in the bus, she was trying to keep the delusions away from her mind. She knew it was her mind that did that to her, it was all in there. So, to distract herself, she started thinking about her day ahead. It was her first day at this school. After so many schools had kicked her out, it was getting difficult to find a job. Being mentally ill is not easy to deal with. She drifted to her childhood memories.
She was born in Medellin, in a colony where people still worshipped Escobar. Being the eldest among her siblings, she was expected to handle great responsibilities. At that time no one knew she was mentally ill, not even her. Some days, her mother used to catch her talking with the air or so it seemed and they always thought she did that to skip the chores. She had a younger sister, Judy, and another brother Jhon who arrived in the family only last month.
Judy had not been in the house after she was born and Val often thought their parents had abandoned her. She hadn’t seen the birth of her sister, but had seen her on one instance, her 5th birthday. But one day, when she mysteriously appeared, things went on like nothing had changed. Judy looked the same as when Val had last seen her, unchanged by time. In the slums of Medellin, this was often the case. Poverty had forced many to abandon their children and standard of living on the streets and in a small house like Valeria’s was the same.
Judy was ignored by everyone. She spent most of her time on the street, talking to unknown people, playing pranks on the toddlers and wandering on the streets. She had a special interest in paranormal things, which to Valeria seemed unpleasant but no one seemed to mind and no one nagged her. When asked by Val, she often murmured something about her being close to finding an actual spirit and when she did, she would bring such enrichment in their standard of living, that Val would ultimately thank her. When she wasn’t wandering on the streets, she would spend her time in a dark room with the Ouija board. She never talked to anyone in the house, always ignored the others. Val did feel little jealous, but accepted it. She liked her sister. Somehow, she connected emotionally with Judy to some level. Val’s ideal self was Judy. Valeria lounged for the freedom Judy had, and her ability to be herself, despite the conditions being against her. She found strength in her younger sister, the strength she would like to possess.
As days passed, Val’s health started deteriorating. On an instance, she was supposed to babysit Jhon as her parents were out working and Jhon was ill so had to be kept at home. When their mother arrived, she found Jhon almost drowning in the bathtub for someone had left the tap running and Jhon unattended. That night, Val’s mother had hit her for the first time. Val kept telling that she had heard some loud noises from the attic and had gone to investigate, leaving Jhon in Judy’s care. But her mother didn’t give a damn and kept on bashing. That night, Val was furious. Judy always got away with everything and the blame shifted on her.
One day, as Val was drying the clothes, Judy came in, excited. She said she had once heard about a cursed lake, outside the town limits. Stories said that if one went swimming there and reached the middle, one could see bodies. If you turned their face, you could see the eyes lifeless, but bloodshot and rheumy. Judy said she wanted to find out if it were true. She needed Val to come with her, and in return, promised to do her chores lined up for the next day. Val hesitated initially. But, after thinking about it, agreed reluctantly, for it meant that she would have freedom for one day at least.
They took a bus which dropped them near the lake area. Judy was leading the walk, for she knew where the lake was, while Val was busy making plans for the next day. When they reached, Judy made sure to match the description of the lake straight ahead, and the lake she had heard about. The lake matched the description perfectly. They undressed, entered the lake and started swimming towards the core, Judy in lead.
Val liked the water. It had been months since she had last gone for a swim and now it felt relaxing. It felt like with each passing stroke, she was leaving behind her responsibilities and becoming free. Free, yes. Just like Judy was. She looked in front, to see Judy, but she was nowhere to be seen. Val had just seen her a moment ago, and then it looked like Judy was about to reach the lake’s center.
Val panicked, hysteria swept her mind blank. She dove in a frenzy to where Judy had been. Suddenly, she felt a strong force hauling her down to the depths. Being a robust swimmer, she strained her muscles and released herself from its grip. Popping her head out of the water and filling her lungs with air seemed like heaven. She was relieved. But, Judy? Val was terrified. Looking down, she saw a head. It was Judy’s! Oh, why, Judy was just messing with her! She was relieved, but angry at her just the same. She turned Judy as to face her. A glimpse at Judy’s face made Val shriek. She could see Judy’s face very well, her eyes lifeless, but bloodshot and rheumy.
The school’s bell stirred her to reality. She was standing at the gate, and the big clock there reminded her of her tardiness. She was late on the first day and that would surely not make a great first impression. Looking at her previous jobs, this was going to be bad. But, however, she did not care. She was invested in thinking what had happened after had Judy died.
The events that followed were blur in her memory, and had never been clear. She remembered being found by the police, by the lake. There had been a missing complaint filed on her when she hadn’t returned home for seven days. She was rushed to the hospital immediately. She tried telling them about Judy, and how she had hidden the body in the woods to keep it safe from the animals. But, no one paid attention nor did they question Judy’s absence. Val was later shifted to a mental hospital, after being diagnosed with schizophrenia. Treatments were painful but the doctors said that her illness will never go away. Yes, she was going to be ill for the rest of her life.
Hence, life went on. She gradually learnt to deal with her mind, learnt to ignore things that would scare her, tried to forget the unpleasant experiences. But, she could never forget her little sister. Judy was the only thing from Val’s past that troubled her. It was so, because Val never had a proper closure, had never understood the secrets that remained with Judy.
As Valeria was waiting outside the principal’s office now, see suddenly noticed the date. Today was the same day Judy had died. What Val did next, she could hardly make any sense out of it. But, the next thing she knew clearly was that she was sitting by the same cursed lake, missing her sister, staring at her Ouija board.
-Hoax Glitzy.

About Hoax Glitzy [the author]

“A beginner here. This is my first attempt at a short story. I am not much of a writer, but I am an enthusiastic reader. I enjoy thrillers, so thought of writing along the same genre. Suggestions to make the story better are welcome.”

Hoax Glitzy:vpbawankar@yahoo.com

C H A N G E

  Greetings readers! The last time we met, we talked about unmasking our insecurities and embracing them. Speaking and writing about acceptance got me thinking even more about it,’ is acceptance enough?’

  Accepting one’s vulnerabilities is a steady start. We still have a great way to go. So, some of you might be questioning what the next move is, and the next move, readers, is changing. Change is never straightforward. It isn’t always good for you. Some of us struggle with change, but my dear readers, it is needed. Or else, what is the point?

   If you have truly accepted your weak points and still chose to sit idle instead of working yourself to be better, you need to change. If you know when you hurt someone and don’t make amends with the person, you need to change. It doesn’t necessarily have to be negative; one can change for good. Always keep room for growth. 

  To change, you need to first see where you went wrong. Next, you need to let go of the idea of you being ideal. Keep your ego aside. This is the most crucial step for change. The final step is to embrace the qualities that made you change yourself and try not to make the same errors you did in the past.

   So readers, what are you changing this week? That is it for this edition of Rubyable! Stay tuned for more. Don’t forget to leave your thoughts in the comments section below! Share and subscribe for more and share a smile today :))

~R

podcasts:

M A S K

Greetings readers, today we are commencing our blog with a concise introspection. Think about your behaviour in these situations. First, I need you to think about your behaviour when you are with your friends. Second, when you are alone. Now, think about all the similarities and the differences in these situations. When I thought about this, I realized that I am two different people in these situations.
These two different aspects of my personality collectively make me. That is how people around me know me.

But there are some cloudy days when I’m not feeling like myself. I’m sure all of us have these days. Some people tend to vent out their emotions and move on. But, some tend to lock their feelings away. They put on a mask and try to mould themselves according to the norms of the society. I want to remind you that its okay to vent out, it’s okay if you’re different and it is okay to ask for help when you need to.
All of us have our internal battles to fight. Today, I want you to embrace those battles and take that mask off of your face because it’s stopping you from being the real you.

~R

Hello readers, tried someting new this month. I’m glad to present a new section of my writeups, RUBYABLE’S SHORT STORIES. Do feel free to express yourself in the comments section below :))

Until the next one!